More pictures.

this is gonna be quite a long post.. haha so beware...
yeah so... the picture below...
is my NEW PHONE!!
yay!!!!! mom bought it for me together with my singapore line..
we got this little baby of mine on saturday!! yay!!
the name is Sony Ericsson K800i~
yeah baby yeah~!! im so high~~~
thanks mom! i waited for 6YEARS to get a new phone..
and finally i got 1!!!!! yay!! so after nagging for 6 years, everything is worth it..

-3.2 megapixel camera with proper flash
-large, sharp 262k colour display
-integrated RSS reader and Web browser
-image stabilisation to assist shooting
-wide array of easy-to-use multimedia features
-64MB internal memory stores around 100 photos

3.2 megapixel~~ yeah!

not that bulky la... hehehe

so yeah, have been over the moon for a long time..
woke up at 8am on sunday.. then headed for steve's house to do some last-minute preparations for the camp tomorrow... im not directly involved in it la.. just that to guide them... and so, took some pictures.... hahaha and of course, with my new phone! yay!
ehem...
was there till 6.30pm... got home cleaned up and went out again..
supposed to be dinner.. but eneded up watching my friend in a badminton tournament..
watched till it was 11pm.. and then, we headed home...
was too tired to blog.. so i went to sleep! hahaha

me in steve's house~ acting cool! haha

von, kim! we were looking at the mirror

cheese! hehe

so, it was monday.. von went to school as usual..
and after lesson, it Rained.. heavily~~
haha then, headed to choa chu kang for buffet lunch... sushi..
along with sisi, elina, yanxi, fenoline, huihui, randy, tionglin, wilfrid, yanliang and dan....
ate till we were super stuffed!

this was just the starting.....

that's randy the basket and dan the noisemaker..

after that, all of us headed home..
and as i was kinda early, i popped by my shop...
and again, took pictures with a few friends..
hahaha they all said that im thinner now...
it might be the causeway walk! hahahaha
yeah blame it on the causeway! ehem...
got home at bout 5.30pm...
and now, am here blogging... hehehehe

afro, kawan baik and von!

haqiem, kawankawan baik and von...

wan ning and von!

yeah so, that's all folks!

u grew fatter by a bit. u said u think alot.n that leads to u eating alot.

haha u shook my hands firmly.seemed like u missed me.
well, have u?

when you go
dont even think
i'll make you try to stay
and maybe when you get back
i'll be off to find another way

¿ von out ?

Rants

von got back home at 10pm last night when classes ended at 7.30pm..
why u guys must say?
it is because....
today 31st may 2007, is a holiday for Singapore!
and so... the kiasu people are so kiasu that THEY have to COME in to GOOD OLD JB to SHOPSHOP!
cant they shop at their own country???
anyway, i waited for A STUPID bus to come for AN hour!!!!! yes... ONE whole hour!
then the bus came.... took the route to woodlands.. cause there was a jam everywhere.... and then.... JAMMED too...
so von decided to walk to the checkpoint.. so got out of the bus, walked and walked and walked like a dead corpse once again... until like after 25minutes of walking, reached woodlands checkpoint.. felt quite happy for awhile... hehe
and then went in.. scanned my passport and blah.... went to line up for the BUSSS.. i was cursing and cursing... okla maybe not cursing.. just complaining to myself bout singaporeans.. cause, i was SURROUNDED by them.. the people in front of me keep talking bout where they are gonna go eat when they reach...
i was like 'omg.....' talking bout how cheap things are and blablabla....
argh~~~ finally got on the bus.. and waited for dad to pick me up... reached home... look at the time, 10pm!!!! wahahahahaha.... my legs were already protesting in anger that they did not wanna move a single bit... now i know how important my legs are... gonna massage them later... hahahaha
see! im going mad! i knew it! and now, it's about 12pm.. and von's studying her beverage.. she's only at page60 of chapter6... but have to finish 188 pages... from chapter 1 - 9.... oh my gosh.. im only at page 60 after 1 hour of studying...
great. so now, back to my books k??
will update soon i guess... oh ya..
von's gonna stay in a friend's house on friday night..
cause after our test tomorrow, the whole class and 2 or 3 other classes are needed to go do SERVICE for SAFTI... with approximate of 500pax... means 500 people to serve! and that they say the event will end at bout 11.30pm... and i won't be able to get back by then... so im staying with a friend! yay~~
wish all of us luck.. hope that we won't screw things up! yeah! we can do it...
okok.. im so gonna die if im not back to my books... hehe
oh ya.. no offense to the singaporeans i know whom i love so dearly yeah?
hehe you know who you guys are... that's just me venting my anger...
JB is flooded with singaporeans~ im not going out today~

if i lay here
if i just lay here
would you lie with me
and just forget the world

\ ^ von out ^ /

updates!

sorry peeps..
havent been updating lately..
sorry ting.. hehe
now here's an update k??
been really hectic for the past 1 week la...
had so many things going on..
be it in school or at home... my brain was like so damn full of stuff..
it was super mega extremely full to the top.. like overflowing kinda full...
yeah.. had 3 tests going on for that week... and 2 presentation to finish.
it was really full... u could imagine... and now, im left with 1 more last paper...
and it's the hardest... have to read 188pages of it... it's called Beverage...
sigh..... someone.. help?? haha
i dont know what to blog already...
just damn damn tired already...
and von's fine.. dont worry..
still trying to adapt to the life of living without uncle black...
oh gosh... cry~~~~~~
ok.. i have nothing else to say.
chaoz peeps...

this could be the start of something new
it feels so right to be here with you
and now im looking in your eyes
i feel in my heart
the start of something new~

! von out !

Sigh

i dont know what to think.
what am i suppose to do?
i went for school. and when i came back,
you're gone. you left me.
did not even wave goodbye.
i saw the last of you yesterday. you seemed to be damn irritated by us. chasing us away.
why?
cause, you are so unselfish. you did not want us to worry about you.
you did not want to trouble us. everything you do is to think of us first before you.
she said she visited you just now in the afternoon.
she said you held on to her hand for quite some time.
like you were telling her something.
like you knew that you have not much time left.
like you were saying your last goodbyes.
i should not have stayed back in school.
i should not have gone out.
i should have came straight back.
at least i could get the LAST glimpse of you.
but no, i did not. i came back late. cause i did not want to come back and listen to stupid news like this. i cant take it.
and when i finally got back, they said they pushed you to somewhere.
cause your heart practically stopped beating.
but it also seems like you were waiting for me to get back.
i could have reached by that time. i could have.
but i chose not to.
im sorry. i truly am.
sorry for not being with you when you needed me.
sorry for leaving you to deal with loneliness alone.
sorry for not caring for you enough.
sorry for all the 'nots' that i didnt do.
i love you. though i did not say it. but actions do speak louder than words.
im gonna miss you.
miss the way you laugh. the way you do things.
the way you wear your hat to go out. the way u wear your dark glasses looking so cool.
the way you cut grass. the way you drink your black coffee and eat you cha kuey.
the way you buy ice cream for me. the way you never get angry with anyone.
the way you used to cycle just to buy breakfast for me.
the way you strike lottery and gave me some of it.
the way you gave me chicken to eat and had none for yourself.
the way you do things without wanting our help.
the way we had to talk louder to make you listen.
the way i talked to you to ask you things. to ask you to eat.
tell me, you did not suffer when you left right?
your heart stopped beating. did you let it stop by itself?
they say you couldnt be saved anymore.
i know you're old. i know.
but.. i dont even know what's that but for.
all i know what to do is cry. and it doesnt help a single bit.
im not strong enough for this. im not.
im hurting. im in pain. im in agony. im emo-ing.
im dying.. my heart died when your heart stopped beating.
i hope you are happy now. at least raine and mama is there welcoming you.
you wont have to be lonely anymore.
but i guess i still have to suffer more before my turn right?
you have suffered enough. in this life.
you have indeed lived well. you even got the chance to move in with us to the new house.
so god, please grant him a place in heaven.
grant him eternal peace. grant him no pain and agony.
grant him a good life up there.
that's all that i can ask for.
do not worry bout von. she will be fine.
she WILL be FINE. do not come asking her anything.
cause she is currently veryvery UNSTABLE.
so after you read. all you need to do is SHUT the HELL UP.
by doing that, you have done a great deal to her.
thanks.

baby fly away. it will be my turn to fly soon.

cause the hardest part of this is leaving you.

when you go, would you even turn to say goodbye?

sir, i wana buy these shoes, for my mummy please,
it's xmas eve and these shoes are just her size,
could you hurry sir? daddy says there's not much time
you see, she's been sick for quite awhile,
and i know these shoes would make her smile,
and i want her to look beautiful
if mummy meets Jesus tonight.

i am not afraid to keep on living
i am not afraid to walk this world alone
honey if you stay, i'll be forgiving
nothing you could say could stop me going home

i love you, i loved you all along.
and i miss you far away for far too long
i keep dreaming you'll be with me and you never go
stop breathing if i dont see you anymore
so far away... far away for far too long.

how could this happen to me?
i made my mistakes got no where to run..
in a perfect world, this could never happen.
in a perfect world, you'd still be here.

~ von out ~

Scared

im scared.
scared of you leaving.
daddy just brought you to the hospital.
coz uncle boon came to see you.
called rourou up to ask bout your condition.
she said to bring you to the hospital right away.
coz at this point of time, you might leave me soon.
even in the middle of the night.
i wanna go see you. but i dont know what
can i do after i see you.
i'll probably cry. weep. sob. or even bleed.
but i still cant do anything but pray.
and at this point of time again,
people start to come. telling me it's ok.
be strong. be brave. i gotta let you go.
but you see, im sick of those words.
sick of all their sad faces when they dont have a clue bout what i feel deep down inside.
yeah. have been hearing and listening to those words over and over again.
till now, it finally has no effects on me anymore.
im cold. and as hard as a stone. im cynical. im emo.
im crazy. im crappy. im not hungry either.
believe what you want. but that's me. and now,
im really not ready for this yet. my mind's not registering well enough.
or, i could be running away. from the real problem.
and that is what will i do when you leave. i seriously wont know what to do.
this is happening too fast. i cant catch what's going on.
i cant. i dont want to either.
and now, i feel like vomiting. i dont know why.
yuck. i pray that you will be ok. but if you really have to go,
please god, take him in the easiest and painless way.
thanks god. very much indeed.
so god help me. help me stand up somehow.
help me to pull through.
but sometimes i wonder. am i really that bad a girl that you have to take people i really care and love away from me? maybe i should just leave myself. that might be better somehow.
sigh. i dont even know what im thinking right now.
my mind's not straight anymore. it never will be.

when will you be home she asked
as she watched the planes take flight
we both know we have no clear
answer to where my dreams may be

i'l be praying every step along the way
even though it breaks my heart
to know we'll be so far apart
i love you too much to make you stay
baby fly away~~

> von out <